Adventures of an Aunt - Rori Edition

She is too cute. She knows it. I smell a storm

a-brewin'. The perfect storm.

"More cookie pease" followed by "SunBEAM!" A natural

follow-up to getting what you want. You might

even call it a victory chant.

The master manipulator at work! Using suggestive

body language, she waves her hands as though leading

you to vote in her favor. She says "More cookie?" but what

she means with the addition of the hand motions is "Look

into my eyes...you are getting sleepy...

you have the power to make me very unhappy OR very

pleased...you want me to be happy, don't you?...You know

what to do...do the right thing...give me the cookie..."

It's confusing when there are there are three women

in the room who tell me what to do but they all get

called something different even though they look

like sisters!

The times, they are a-changing.

I was saddened today by the reality of the world we live in. My classes have just recently finished To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee's classic coming-of-age story. For the last few years, I haven't shown the Academy Award winning movie in its entirety because I've had a hard time getting the students to actually watch it. They spend more time complaining about how much they "hate old movies" and gasping, "Oh, you mean it's in black and white?" that I haven't bothered (with how often they beg to see movies in class, and how I haven't shown one all year, you'd think they'd just be excited regardless of what it was!). I could only manage to show the trial scene of Tom Robinson and keep their attention.

Well, with some of my classes, I decided I would show the whole thing because of scheduling issues elsewhere. After the initial complaining, the kids actually started to get into it. I was very pleased. As the movie starts to wrap up, there is a pivotal scene right at the end of the movie (and book) where the neighborhood "phantom" Arther "Boo" Radley, who nobody has scene in over 15 years and has a suburban full of rumors in tow, saves children Scout and Jem from the murderous attack of the villain of the story. Scout, the main character and narrator, is finally face to face with the person who has filled her young head with so many wild imaginings, only to learn that Boo is not at all the scary and twisted character she and so many others imagined, and in fact has saved her and her brother's lives. She spends a few moments alone with him, they stare quietly and with concern at Jem, and she even encourages him to "pet" her unconscious older brother on the head while he is still asleep; she can tell that that is what he wants to do.

The problem? Enter the interpretations of students growing up in our modern world. A world where leaving a child alone with a strange man is dangerous. A world where a man who follows children, as Boo Radley did, is a pedophile. A world where a strange man staring at and petting on the head a child is not to be trusted. A world where a father who leaves his kids alone with a person who is rumored to peek in windows at night and lurks in shadows is irresponsible because of the dangers and what-if's that are rampant. And in this present that exists, my students snickered, gasped, and gaped at the wholly innocent and touching scene that closes the movie.

I hope and pray that To Kill A Mockingbird, arguably one of the best known and loved of American novels, stays relevant but more so that we never get to the point where kindness and tenderness are so unrecognizable that they disappear forever.

Why I Do It

Today I was reminded why I became a teacher. I saw a defeated student transform into a smiling victor as I sat and helped him make corrections to a pretty iffy persuasive essay - an essay that he had written and turned in himself and on time. I had my doubts if he even would because he's an at-risk student, complete with the list of stereotypes that go along with his situation, so even though I've spent a lot of time working with this kid for the past few months, I am used to students like him bailing out on me. He didn't let me down. He did the original assignment even though I'm pretty sure he knew it wouldn't be very good when he did it to begin with. I was pretty tough on his paper, evident by all of the red corrections and comments that even the strongest of heart would find daunting. The students were given an all-or-nothing 100 point assignment to correct their mistakes. I figured that he would probably take one look at those red marks and decide then and there that he would never be able to complete what was asked, or at best that he would do a half hearted job two weeks after it was due and after I would bug him about it for days. Instead, he asked for help when we went to the lab today instead of waiting for me to come to him (often naggingly) like he has in the past. The bell signaling the end of the day rang and he stayed 40 minutes behind and we finished it together. I am so proud of him. So very very proud. He may not pass any other quarter. He may not write another essay for me or anyone else ever again, but today he did not fall through the cracks. Today, he was a writer.

My profession may not be for everyone, but it sure is for me. Today was a good day.

Curling Up on a Snowy Morning

In my readiness for spring, tempted especially by the pre-spring 40's and 50's we've been experiencing in southern Utah, I was humbled by both the weather forecasts and this morning's fresh layer of snow. I am restless for a new niece, long awaited news, skirts and sandals weather, planned and tentative trips, change, the spring poetry unit, and seeing the fruits of fall bulb planting. But, as usually, my lessons in patience must be reinforced and tested. So while I still linger in my pj's, sitting by the window avoiding the cold, I am posting these (hopefully) last remnants of winter - back from my Christmas in Wisconsin - with the hopes that if I acknowledge it's presence and, dare I say it, majesty, that winter will concede to spring.

The Remedy

I was mad at my students today. And yesterday. And the day before. And before that too. We are working on an essay. I teach it step by step. I show them examples of what I expect. I give them forms to fill in that make it very clear. I give them class time to work on it after I model the proper outcomes. And they don't do it. And then on the day they should be typing, they are starting at step one of 6. Class period after class period after class period. And then they all need help at the same time doing those steps I taught them about a week or two before. But are they patient? NO. Do they roll their eyes when I help another student before them? YES. Do they walk up and just start asking me their questions while I am sitting next to another student, mid sentence, trying to answer another's questions? YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT.

This happens every time I teach writing. I am usually OK the first few class periods, but by 4th period on the second day (B day) I am DONE. It doesn't help that 4th period on B day (essentially 8th period for those not familiar with a block schedule) is my naughtiest class. Naughtiest = lowest average grades of all my classes. Naughtiest = rambunctious, disorganized, unprepared, most immature of all my classes.

But just when I think I will explode with frustration, Heavenly Father has somehow blessed me with the ability to make myself laugh unexpectedly. He uses my own words against me. And laughter, as most of us have come to know, is the best medicine. Let me paint a picture for you:

It is Tuesday. 2:20 pm. Cedar High School Writing Lab. There are about 20 minutes left of the school day. Three boys - Dillan, AJ and Kirby - are still working on their outlines though they should be typing. They are not allowed to type until all of their pre-writing is done. AJ has barely gotten past picking his topic after being gone for a week. Of course I have chided them more than once as they continue to waste time. In fact, I chided the whole class before we even got to the computer lab in an effort to prepare them for my wrath at this point in the day. So I am livid when I see them essentially playing keep-away with a stapler. My mouth opens. I am about to smite them to the ground with my quick and biting remarks. And then I see it. While AJ prepares his usual "it's his fault" excuse, his partner in crime Kirby will not make eye contact. This is just the fodder I need for my verbal lashing. "Really?" I say - after all, I have already been nagging them for the last hour. "You're not doing anything wrong? You were just GIVING Dillan the stapler?" (Insert here a weak assortment of excuses from three nervous 14 year olds)
"You know how I know that that is not the case? Kirby won't even look at me. He knows all the fires of Hades are beaming out of my eyeballs right now, burning him to the core of his soul."

And that's when it happened. I start to crack a smile. At the words. And then all of the 'oohs' and that followed my storming gate to the boys on the other side of the room turn to chuckles. And then, as I realize I'm in trouble and breaking my formidable facade, I have to say that I am only laughing because otherwise I would be crying. But mostly I know I've pretty much lost any hope of being the bad guy. I still "banish" Kirby and AJ to the "netherworld" of the classroom and nurses office to finish their already-late assignments in isolation, but I instantly feel better somehow. And the next kids I help don't get such harsh responses from me. And the kids after that come to give me high fives because they figured out for themselves what they were supposed to do next when I wouldn't tell them what to write when they got stuck (because they didn't do it a week ago when it was assigned and I was angry). Where those words came from I don't know - fires of Hades? core of soul? - or at least, I don't know for sure. But if you're like me and believe in tender mercies, the kind that keep you from damaging someone else's day or the ones that keep you from quitting your job when sometimes it stinks but it's really your calling in life, then hopefully you believe in a Father in Heaven who isn't too great to know that sometimes the best remedy for a bad day is the laughing kind.

My 2.3 Seconds of Not-So Much-Fame

Two summers ago I was in an SUU recruitment commercial. It was kinda fun and mostly embarassing. I'd only seen it once, and I just remembered I had done it - I couldn't even remember what it was called! But I found it, so here it is.

If you have children -

- and I EVER catch you doing this to your child, in all seriousness I will reach through this computer screen and slap you upside yo' head!


The mother, who so proudly buys lacefront wigs for her baby girl, is quoted as saying, “It’s never too early for my baby to start looking glamorous like Beyonce!”

I'm warning you...

When in doubt, make a flow chart.

Kids do the darndest things!

Over the years there have been many hilarious blurtations that have taken place in my class periods. I am forgetting many of the things that have had me laughing for days. In an effort to preserve the events, pranks, and blurts of my students (and since this week added a new "funny" to the list), here is a post that is dedicated to some of them:

- Coming into my classroom after lunch and all the desks are facing the back of the classroom.

- Coming into class after lunch and finding all of the desks, my chair, my keyboard, and everything else on my desk tipped upside down.

- Coming into my class after lunch and finding all of my dry erase markers, pencils, stapler, and mini-Brett Favre bobble head (pre double retirement) taped to the ceiling. Tape is also across each line of keys on the keyboard, as well as covering the bottom of my mouse and covering the opening of the tissue box.

- A dead silent classroom. A 170 point final test over a novel. A sudden outburst of laughter. Everyone looks to Tara, this year's resident Sassy Spice, and I ask a simple "What?"

"'Circle the correct answer.' Like we'd circle the wrong answer."

You'd be surprised, Tara. Very very surprised.

- A student teacher places an engagement photographs on the overhead, demonstrating various points about how photography can be symbolic. In the photo, the groom-to-be is holding the bride-to-be. We see only his back as he looks across a lake to the mountains in the distance. She looks back at the camera - and us. Student teacher: "Him holder her is symbolic of his feelings for her - that he will always take care of her." Trajan: "If he doesn't take care of her, I sure will!"

- "Ms. Hensel, I know that people from Canada are Canadians, and people from Mexico are Mexican, but what are people from the United States called?"

- I pull the overhead plug out of the outlet and the grounder post is still in the socket. Despite my students telling me that there is no charge going to the grounder post and that I can just pull it out, I step to the phone to call Fernlee, the head maintenance worker - No one is getting electrocuted on my watch! I turn back toward the class just as Dylan is on the floor, fingers pulling at the grounder post, convulsing. I scream and and instantly start crying as I watch what I think is a 14 year old being electrocuted. Seconds later he falls to the floor laughing at me, along with the rest of the class.

- Opening my desk drawer after school to grab a pencil and almost grabbing a tarantula that had been lovingly placed there by a student. The tarantula was dead. I didn't know that.

- The homecoming football game, 2007, just happens to fall on my birthday. My friend and co-worker Wayne Decker finds out and has it announced over the announcements that morning. As I leave the football game later that night and pass the student section, the entire student body sings "Happy Birthday" to me. I may or may not have started crying.

- I'm on the phone in my classroom after school talking to the oral surgeon about the upcoming procedure I will be having. Three male students stop by after baseball practice to say hello. Just as I am asking about the implants I will be getting. DENTAL implants. They didn't hear the 'dental' part.

- Realizing that one of my students is the nephew of a guy I was madly crazy for in college, and while trying to give him some 'dirt' on my former crush without letting on that he was indeed a crush, unintentionally slipping too much info.

Me: "Tell him that I found out that he made out with my sister!"

Jace: "Wait. Why do you care if he made out with your sister? Did you kiss him?"

Me: Silence. Instant blushing. what do i do. WHAT DO I DO????

Jace: "OH MY GOSH!!! YOU MADE OUT WITH DIGGER" (notice how he has already exaggerated the information).

Me: "No! Wait...!"

Jace: "I can't WAIT to ask him about it! I can't believe you were almost my aunt. You were almost my AUNT!!! That's SO COOL!"

- I have a date on a weeknight. We will be heading up the mountain to go four-wheeling. I stop at his place of employment, which is on 'Burger Alley' in town, to change. Three students see me and do the natural thing: they park behind me and wait. But I don't come out wearing the same clothes. I don't come out alone. And I don't leave in my car. As we are waiting to back onto busy 200 N, I see three heads ducking up and down behind the dashboard of a pickup truck. Seconds later I recognize one of them, and then all three of them. They hang out of the truck window laughing at me and pointing as my date and I pull away. The next day, and just about every day for the next TWO years (no joke) I get asked about George. It doesn't help that he comes to school with a bouquet of flowers a few months later during class (which happened to have one of the original three in it) to embarrass me because I told him about it. The date was five years ago. I still get asked when I see those now graduated students.

- MaKenna stands to present her project on the black plague at the end of our Shakespeare unit but holds it close to her chest until the very end. When she finally shows it to us, there are two live mice (primary culprit in spreading the black death) in a shadow box. She finishes and sits down. 10 minutes later, she looks down to see one of the mice squeezing out between the 'breathing' gap she leaves for them. The other one is gone. We did eventually catch it. Eventually.

I'm sure I'll remember more. I'm thinking of some already, but I need to pack for my holiday travels bright and early in the morning and haven't started yet. I hope my trip down memory lane was entertaining (especially for you, Michelle!). Merry Christmas everyone!

Giving Thanks Portland Style

Well, Thanksgiving is over and Christmas is a short week away. So in this brief interlude of holiday reprieve, catching up on blogging seems like the way to go before the onslaught of tinseled cheer. I flew to Portland to visit with Claudia, Adam, and baby Claire for Thanksgiving. We had a delightful time shopping; eating good food; walking downtown; going to the zoo where we got up-close and personal with lions, chimpanzee's, otters, and cheetahs; and watching movies. My only complaint was not having enough time. Claudia is a delightful host and the perfect companion, Claire is cheerful and my content buddy who's up for anything, and Adam's biting humor adds some spice. I just love exploring this cool city with my amazing sister and her family!

What 'choo lookin' at, Willis?

I contributed too! I promise! Just not very much...

Cheetah's are cool, especially when separated by only an inch of glass.

"Claire, if you don't stop whining right now, there are some big kitties right there that would be very interested in meeting you!" (Note to readers: Claire did not whine, despite not getting a nap. This is a purely fictional interpretations of the face Claudia is making in this picture.)

The fact that the animals at this zoo actually hang out in the observation areas so you can get right up close to them is wonderful and probably one of the funnest zoo experiences I've ever had.

The girl has some 'junk in the trunk'!

Gives new meaning to a bear hug, doesn't it!

"No, I will NOT smile, no matter how much I want to. But you can keep trying to get me to if you like. It's your time you're wasting, and I'm having fun laughing internally at how ridiculous you look."

Mt. Saint Helen, Mt. Renier, and Mt. Hood from above the clouds as the sun is rising as I'm flying out of Portland. The last think I saw before I closed my eyes and fell asleep. Thanks for letting me visit Claudia!

Reconnecting

I'm an insecure friend. This makes me appear to be an uncaring friend, when really I sometimes feel paralyzed with caring a lot but not knowing what to do to be a good one and even concern that what I've thought of isn't good enough. So often I do nothing instead. Distance - physical or emotional - leads me to fall out of touch with a lot of people, sometimes when they live in the same space as me, when that is the last thing I want. I remember even as a child being aware of my friendship faults and insecurities. The good news is that I have some friends who haven't given up on me. The good news is that I was able to reconnect with someone through the lost domain of emailing that I thought I had lost but maybe I haven't. Here is my ode (not the John Keats kind) to finding old and lost friends:

"Building Words"

They say writing letters is an art

rapidly being lost to time and movements of quickness.

And I believe the ambiguous ‘them’ when the telephone

imposes spaces of stressed urgency to fill, reminding us both

of absence and

distance

and of the loudness of silence when words can’t

satisfy the

passage

of

time –

the quiet ending in a lonely void.

But the lost art has led to

the science of a foundedness of you

and for now letter by letter suffices as we repave bridges

that had been weather worn from disuse, reconnecting

through words carefully chosen and common, with

no immediacy of tied tongues, building

one on top of the next to reconstruct

what could become something

that looks like

friendship.

Team "I Like Real Men Instead of Vampires and Werewolves"

I haven't blogged for a while. I was boring myself with my photo-posts, yet couldn't think of a mind altering conversation piece to put down in cyber memory. I still can't. I'm grateful for many things this time of year, naturally. I'm also resisting the urge to complain about people's Facebook status updates(though I'm on it myself multiple times a day) and Twilight movie obsessions (which I will most likely see this weekend) as it will prove just how very hypocritical I am. My worst fear has come to pass - a person I taught came over two nights ago in a social context to hang out with some of my roommates. My deepest wishes have not yet come to pass. Lisa said I'm not allowed to put up Christmas decorations until after Thanksgiving, but in an act of defiance I at least took the storage bins out of the storage room, leaving them open on the TV room floor bearing their contents. I need to leave by 4 this morning to catch a flight to Portland, but I haven't packed yet and I should be going to bed 30 minutes ago. But life is good and there are no true complaints, sufferings, or worries as of right now. I do wonder if there will come a time when the free download trial addition of hidden object games on my computer will run out, because then what will I do for countless hours of wasted time after work as I prepare to take a really long nap really late in the day that will then keep me up 'til all hours of the morning during the work week? Now THAT I don't want to think about it because it might just be too painful.

Wishing you all a pain free intro to the best of holiday seasons! Happy Thanksgiving!

A Star is Born!

A star was born this weekend. Me!...or at least if one wans't born, showed up at your door and invited herself in for cookies and milk. That was my experience this weekend when I had a walk-on part in Cedar High's production of "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat." I didn't find out what my line was until that night, nor did I know what my costume would be until I arrived at the school, but it was a blast. My favorite part of high school was being the the plays and musicals, so even though this wasn't MY production, I sure made myself right at home in the props room with my friend and coworker Kodi who walked on with me, all while doing our very best to steal the show - or at least the scene we were in!

I want regular Mikey back, not DinoMikey!

This was funny the first time he did it. But after a whole weekend of this almost nonstop, including the bites and near-bites, I want my cuddly Mikey buddy back!

Falling for Fall!

Autumn has always been my favorite season. I love getting out the cozy clothes, the changing leaves, Halloween decorations, the football, and the air smells like everything good. I just wish it lasted longer! The leaves never last long enough and Halloween is over too quickly. Before we know it, Thanksgiving will be here and the Christmas decorations will be coming out. So here are my last clingings to this wonderful season, with pictures from the Southern Utah University campus and homecoming game, before winter pries my cold bony fingers loose.
What a wonderful setting for a peaceful evening walk with Claudia and Claire!

Claudia getting a little fresh with Will!
I attended SUU for 4 1/2 years and this is the first time I've taken pictures of the campus - five years after I graduated!
Go Tori!
S-U-U! S-U-U!
So maybe we spent a little more time catching up and watching Meg's sister cheer, but SUU won on a glorious day to be outside with your best friend while stuffing your face with polish dogs and imitation nacho cheese!

Thor the Tunderbird making the rounds.

Spooky pumkin skeleton!

Happy little ghost! And Happy Halloween to all!

Claudie and Claire come a'callin'!

October was a great month for spending time with my family, not to mention celebrating bithdays. I always feel like our visits will get fewer and farther between, but so far that familial drought hasn't started. First Mark visited, and two weeks later Claudia and Claire came down to Utah. It was wonderful to have my "womb"mate come to visit this past month, bringing Clairebear with her. Thanks for the wonderful weekend!